It's really not about me.
I have to remind myself of that. Sometimes when I watch myself, interact with the world, I cringe and scream wildly in my mind.."STOP BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!"...but that point inevitably comes. I just....ugh. When my beloved spouse sends me flowers, and they are the only flowers in the world I actually dislike...I start to have an internal meltdown because how could he not know that I hate them!? I feel happy and butthurt at the same time. Or how my kids were completed assholes and chose to stay home when I went to my birthday dinner alone. It quickly became all about my expectation and disappointment. As a wise woman I know tells me semi-regularly, expectations are but premeditated resentments. Let that one sink in... But all that ^ afforded me the opportunity to be with my Mom as a person, not as a mom or daughter. What a rare gift, to see her as she is, not as I perceive her to be. I think about all the people I've met who only get to know their loved ones, trul